Westward, Ho - Part II

You guys.

I just got back from visiting Sunshine in Colorado. What a lovely, lovely place. "Breathtaking vistas!" I shrieked as we drove the windy road through Rocky Mountain National Park. D-Bag replied,

"I took your mom's breath away last night with my vista".


I put up with the your-mom jokes since he tolerated my "white people music" on the ride down. And he gave me beef jerky.

We camped on the shores of Jackson Lake and saw a huge owl and some deer and this dead fish. At night, I woke up and heard crunchy little footsteps outside my tent.

We hiked up Shadow Mountain/Mount Shadow/Whatever. Sunshine told us the names of plants. There was a rock that looked like a sea lion, and one like Jabba the Hutt. We tripped over many tree roots.

At mealtimes, I sat around and watched everyone cook. This was the best pancake in the history of pancakes. Even with all of the bugs in it. Our last stop was Denver, where we rode around on the city bikes while S was at work. We went to the outdoor superstore, REI, and a very cool craft shop called Fancy Tiger.

In conclusion,
everyone needs to go to Colorado. It's great.

P.S. The photo above demonstrates how I lock my bike.

FAIL.

Immediately after this photo was taken, I broke the key off inside the lock.

FAIL.

Pack Attack

You guys,

Today we're going to talk about.....fanny packs. Traditionally known as the token accessory of shameful fathers everywhere, they are also a necessary evil when it comes to outdoorsy endeavors. I'm not going to go tripping up a mountain again with a giant hobo bag full of art supplies and huckleberry flavored food, but it is nice to carry a camera/phone/cheese sandwich/etc. and still have your hands free for when you get lost and have to slide down a 50 degree grade to get back to the trail. Coughcough.

It is unfortunate then that fanny packs are boring, unflattering, dorky, and so ugly that not even Louis Vuitton or puppies can make them cute.

BLEH!BLEH!But then came the saviour of all fanny packs - the fanny pack that atoned for the sins of all of the fanny packs that came before it:Sold by carrotcake on Etsy. Ah! I'd wear the crap out of that thing if it didn't cost so much.

Alas, I am poor, and besides, last night while I was laying on my bedroom floor listening to the John Denver and the Muppets Christmas album, I got this great idea to just invent my own fanny pack and call it the "Butt Load", then market it to hipsters and make tons and tons of money, woo! Sounds good, right? We'll see how that goes.

Now that I've found my camera, you can once again expect regular posts full of rand-o photographs like these:

Aren't you so excited? I know you are.

I spent the weekend lugging Tildar around like a baby (she's getting fat!), working on projects like the bun-mask, and going to Nebraska City to buy apple-y things and take Christmas card photos in the woods with my hyper brothers.

Stop by my house tomorrow night for apple crisp and vanilla ice cream! I am serious as a heart attack - do it!

The post where I say "wee" twice

You guys.

Frank and I discovered an amazing hidden Kansas gem last week called Sycamore Springs Resort.

According to their website, Sycamore Springs used to be, like, the "hotbed of healthy". The mineral springs there attracted all kinds of sicklies lookin' for a cure and the business people who made money off of them.

Nowadays, it's still a pretty impressive outfit they've got going - mineral springs (water tastes like meat, blegh), campground, tennis/basketball court, a wee hiking trail, mini golf course, fully-operational skating rink (!), and CREEPY-ASS HOTEL.

Creepiness factors:

1. Look at it(creepy!).
2. It may or may not be sitting where the old hotel/hospital BURNT DOWN(creepy!).
3. The main floor is littered with antique physician's implements(creepy!).
4. The lights were on, but nobody was home, as they say. Actually, we heard snoring but never saw the other guests(creepy!).

In all fairness, it was also super awesome. The main floor had a den with a fireplace/TV/radio and a bunch of board games. One of the toilets was pull-flush(!) and there was a giant clawfoot tub in the communal bathroom. We got a bedroom with big windows and cutesy quilts for $55 and stayed up into the wee hours of the morning drinking coffee, eating twinkies and potato chips, and writing scripts for Ghetto Home Fabulous: The Show. Hee!

I highly recommend it for a spooky-fun weekend getaway. It's only two hours from Lincoln or Omaha, just south of the Nebraska border. And if you do decide to go.....take me with you.

WHY FALL IS THE BEST SEASON EVER AND IF YOU DON'T AGREE YOU'RE TOOOOOTALLY WRONG

- roasted butternut squash with onion salt and red pepper (Is there a proper way to peel a squash? Someone please enlighten me!)

- pumpkin+yellow cake mix dessert (shiz is delicious!)

- The colors, Duke, the colors!

- apple orchard trips

- that smell!

- candy corn pumpkins on top of cupcakes

- HALLOWEEN!

- THANKSGIVING!

- CHRISTMAS IS ALMOST HERE (yesssssss)

Tell me how yo' fall is fallin'. What is everyone going to be for Halloween, eh? I still can't decide :/

Yay!

Sea Wolf is coming to Lincoln!

Let's go see the show together.
September 29th.
Mark your calendars.

I'm working on a new mask! I'll put some photos up when it's finished.