Westward, Ho - Part II

You guys.

I just got back from visiting Sunshine in Colorado. What a lovely, lovely place. "Breathtaking vistas!" I shrieked as we drove the windy road through Rocky Mountain National Park. D-Bag replied,

"I took your mom's breath away last night with my vista".


I put up with the your-mom jokes since he tolerated my "white people music" on the ride down. And he gave me beef jerky.

We camped on the shores of Jackson Lake and saw a huge owl and some deer and this dead fish. At night, I woke up and heard crunchy little footsteps outside my tent.

We hiked up Shadow Mountain/Mount Shadow/Whatever. Sunshine told us the names of plants. There was a rock that looked like a sea lion, and one like Jabba the Hutt. We tripped over many tree roots.

At mealtimes, I sat around and watched everyone cook. This was the best pancake in the history of pancakes. Even with all of the bugs in it. Our last stop was Denver, where we rode around on the city bikes while S was at work. We went to the outdoor superstore, REI, and a very cool craft shop called Fancy Tiger.

In conclusion,
everyone needs to go to Colorado. It's great.

P.S. The photo above demonstrates how I lock my bike.

FAIL.

Immediately after this photo was taken, I broke the key off inside the lock.

FAIL.

Pack Attack

You guys,

Today we're going to talk about.....fanny packs. Traditionally known as the token accessory of shameful fathers everywhere, they are also a necessary evil when it comes to outdoorsy endeavors. I'm not going to go tripping up a mountain again with a giant hobo bag full of art supplies and huckleberry flavored food, but it is nice to carry a camera/phone/cheese sandwich/etc. and still have your hands free for when you get lost and have to slide down a 50 degree grade to get back to the trail. Coughcough.

It is unfortunate then that fanny packs are boring, unflattering, dorky, and so ugly that not even Louis Vuitton or puppies can make them cute.

BLEH!BLEH!But then came the saviour of all fanny packs - the fanny pack that atoned for the sins of all of the fanny packs that came before it:Sold by carrotcake on Etsy. Ah! I'd wear the crap out of that thing if it didn't cost so much.

Alas, I am poor, and besides, last night while I was laying on my bedroom floor listening to the John Denver and the Muppets Christmas album, I got this great idea to just invent my own fanny pack and call it the "Butt Load", then market it to hipsters and make tons and tons of money, woo! Sounds good, right? We'll see how that goes.