Happy Seasonal Affective Disorder Awareness Month

Oh look, here's a stuffed Beholder monster from Dungeons and Dragons that I made for my Secret Santee a few weeks ago....

HAIRCUTMONTAGE

This is my little brother. We don't have much in common. He is the iron-pumping Abercrombie mall-cop wannabe firefighter, and I'm the flabby library artist granola-tofu-kombucha "hippie". And still, one of the best parts about going home is when I'm standing precariously on the edge of the bathtub with our wonky old hair clippers in hand, and he says, "Do what you want, and then shave it all off". Then we laugh and talk about funny youtube videos while I give him mohawks and devil horns.

Same goes for my older brother and dad, of course- except they are less adventurous with their hair, and instead of youtube, it's talk of old movies and time travel, respectively.

Hey, remember when I used to have that blog feature called "Things That Look Like Other Things"?

Well, here's a tent that looks a slice of watermelon.
Yours, for a cool $774.

via Nevver

Three yards, silk screened. I tea-dyed it in my bathtub (sooooo not getting my security deposit back) in an attempt to downplay the unintentionally Hannah Montana-esque color scheme. Now it just looks like Hannah Montana fabric that sat in an attic for eighty years.

Knots

I screenprinted this one (three whole yards!) in pink/blue/purple. It's soaking in the sink right this minute. Photos to come.

The Meantime

Hello, strangers.

I feel like it wasn't even that long ago that I posted my first shibori samples from class, but here we are at the end of the semester and things are winding down.

Here is one of the other projects we did- a repeat print in three colorways, inspired by the design of Middle Eastern rugs (or in my case, an old tea tin that I found at the back of my parents' coat closet).

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Good golly miss molly, I love me some Fall. Have I said that before? I believe I have.

This year there will be pumpkin bread, cherry apple cider, trips to the orchard, and midnight dancing in my garden before I rip up all of my dying plants. Out with the old and in with the new. I'm also looking forward to the lack of leaf-raking (cause I don't have a yard, woo!), Halloween parties (cause I will be in THEEUROPEANUNION) and cold ears, cause I made myself this here hat.

I finished it a couple of weeks ago, while I was sick with allergy-stuff and bored in bed all day. The pattern is from Erica-Knits. I had to make a few alterations so that it would be big enough to fit my head, but I think it turned out quite well regardless. Now it just needs to be blocked, and maybe I will add a pompom.

(note: Is "pompom" spelled "pompom" or "pompon"? Is that latter just a european spelling? Maybe it's like the whole "sherbert"-"sherbet" thing.)

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Here are some examples of what I've been working on in class lately. The fabric is stitched or wrapped and the threads are pulled as tight as possible and knotted(oh, my fingers are covered in blisters!). When the samples are dyed, the color can't penetrate between the pleats, so those areas are left white. Most of these samples didn't turn out as I had wanted, but I do like the resulting textures- especially on the last one pictured below.


1. Burlap, machine stitching
2. Cotton Muslin3. Cotton Muslin

4. Wool

For Your Viewing Pleasure

Here are a few interesting documentaries if you've got some time to kill.

A revolutionary tattoo artist:


London apartment dwellers. Wait for the sad quiet man tell his story at the end.


Italian teeth knocked out of Italian mouths:


Tattoos and prisons in Russia:

Ghetto Home Fabulous: We Party Right

I loved the Lord of the Rings so hard when I was in high school, you guys. Probably a little too hard. For a while, my brothers and I had memorized every line of those movies, and we would recite them all as we watched. Last weekend I finally scanned this poster that I made for my little brother's birthday back in 2002. I would hole up in my bedroom every day after school, pop the Fellowship of the Rings soundtrack in my little CD player, and bust out the colored pencils....

(You can see a better version of this on my tumblr)

Anywho, because of my undying love for all things Tolkien/theme parties, I decided to make everyone dress up and watch movies for my birthday.

My friends are incredibly good sports who are always willing to make me happy by wearing ridiculous costumes.

Here we have Tom Bombadil, Gandalf, Arwen, an Entwife, Sauron, Galadriel, and Gregolas.
I made this wizard hat the Ghetto Home Fabulous way - out of paper bags, duct tape, and tempera paint.
I think Tom won the prize for best costume. Those are wooden weapons that he made himself when he was a kid.
For dinner, I made four cheese macaroni with fried ham. The recipe is from the Best Recipe cookbook - literally the best cookbook in the whole wide world. Also pictured is my most recent garden harvest. There are sooooo many tomatoes - I need to do some major blanchin' and freezin' tonight!
Here I am as the Dark Lord, canoodling with one of my sworn enemies. A beautiful elf with a beautiful ent <3
I promised a certain lady that this photo wouldn't be seen on the facebook, but I love it so much I couldn't help putting it up here. She was showing us what Liv Tyler's lips look like, haha.
And you know that if the Russian comes to your party, then it is indeed a special occasion.

Next up: First Ladies of America theme party (oh, I hope!)

Tommy Toes

It seems like my long, sweaty hours spent in the garden this summer are finally paying off. Everything looked like it was on its vegetable deathbed for a while there. But almost every day this week I've gotten to walk home with my skirt pockets full of tomatoes - in all sizes and weird shapes. I eat them the way my grandma taught me, sliced up and sprinkled with onion salt.

This one was my favorite. I named it Gomer :)

Laundromat Quotes: Part II

Snack Bar Lady: Oh, you got the bad one (washer). You just gotta smack it real hard for it to work.

Me: tap tap

Snack Bar Lady: No! Think o' somebody you hate. Now bang it real hard! Bang it!

...........................

Uhhh, in other news, a mighty storm came through town last night and totally ruined my plans for swimming fun with Iliana. Afterwards, we drove past downed power lines and broken trees laying on top of cars while I smugly explained "this happens aaaaall the time here- no big deal. We midwesterners are hardy folk." Ha ha hooooo.

Sad Sack Mondays

Ghetto Home Fabulous: Sugar Voodoo - Putting Butts on Vegans Since 1875

I would say that given my "experience" in "sampling" baked goods "over the years", my cake-critiquing skills are....advanced. Not to brag or anything. But I do know a good cake when I taste one. And with that being said, I will admit to you that I think most vegan baked goods taste like those rubber chips they use to replace sand on playgrounds. Nothing can live up to my three tasty boyfriends: Barry Unsalted Butter, Evan Eggs, and Henry Heavy-Cream.

Sometimes, though, you become friends with some dude who does karate and dresses up like Keyboard Cat for Halloween and happens to not eat animal products, and you can't out of the goodness of your heart stand to watch him nibble on fruit while you shovel down a huge piece of Grandma's lard-crust french silk pie at one of your weird parties.

Thus, I give you the following recipe which was probably-but-don't-quote-me-on-this created by some lazy wife of a lactose intolerant sailor in 1870's Connecticut. Seriously- it's an oldie. And I said "lazy" because this cake is meant to be mixed and baked in a single pan. Yes, that's right! That means that instead of washing dishes while your goods are bakin', you can spend that time trying out awkward new moves on your exercise ball, forcing your cranky pet to snuggle with you, or crying about the direction your life is taking. Just my style!

1 1/3 c flour
1 c sugar
1/4 c cocoa
1/2 t salt
1 t baking SODA (not powder! not powder!)
1 t vanilla
1 T vinegar
1/3 c oil
1 c water or soy milk

Grease a 9ish" by 9ish" pan, yo. Mix your dry ingredients in said pan. Make three "craters" in the dry mixture. Into each hole, pour the vanilla, vinegar and oil respectively. Pour water or soy milk over the whole thing and mix it up, baby. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes - nobody likes crispy cake, so keep an eye on that sucker.

If forgot to take pictures before I ate the thing, so instead I made this highly accurate rendering in MS Paint. Enjoy.

Vacation

This is what I do in the car for eight hours. Do little kids still braid friendship bracelets like this? P.S. My mom used to use that duckie safety pin to fasten my diapers and she still carries it around in her purse. How bout that.

Here Is a Shell for You

This week I took a break from tending my jankety garden to actually work on something that is not related to my jankety garden. Now it's done and I can go back to pulling weeds. Hooray.

So, back in January, Mike made this film for art class by manipulating/recording video feedback. Eventually I was like, "I want that on my bod-ay", so I made this print by chopping up some stills from the video and gluing them back together. Like a mad scientist. I finally ordered the fabric yesterday, and as soon as it arrives I will be making a "Xenon Carr comes back to Earth in 2011"-themed crop top.

If anyone is, uhhh, interested in buying this fabric, you can order it off Spoonflower - just search for "ghettohomefabulous".

Pokey

Well hey there. Long time, no see. Here's a little P[ro]J[ect] that I've put off posting for a while.

This is a riff on Nubby Twiglet's spike shoes from a couple months ago. I decided to use some cheaper canvas shoes (these are from Forever 21, and there are some good ones at Target, too), and focus the spikes in the back.

These spikes were purchased here - your friendly neighborhood goth superstore, and they come with prongs or screw-in backs to secure them to your material. Easy peasy.

Then all you have to do is walk around a poke people with the back of your foot.

The End.

Ghetto Home Fabulous: Don't Go Chasin' Waterfall Shower Curtains

This is the "Waterfall" shower curtain from Urban Outfitters. Guess how much it costs? Too much for Heezy Breezy.

More specifically: $68 (there's a similar [quite lovely] model at Anthropologie that costs $118 - ouchie).Being kind-of-poor-but-not-really-poor-enough-to-justify-complaining-about-being-poor-all-of-the-time, I've got to decorate on a budget, and when I say that, I mean - make my own shower curtain and pretend it didn't cost me $50 (that's for twelve yards of muslin, two spools of thread, and eight yards of trim).

Here it is:
Here's what it looks like without the visual equivalent of auto-tuning:If you look really closely you can see my underpants still hanging from the towel rack. Isn't that exciting?And here is a close-up. I sewed a plain curtain first and then attached yards and yards and yards of pleated, trimmed muslin strips. That's about twenty hours of my life that I'll never get back (that I can fondly remember while I'm sitting on the toilet).

Two hundredth post, holla.

I'm just gonna regurgitate some fashion-weeky goodness today. How bout these bitchin' prints, huh? As I've mentioned a couple times before, it's my dream to dress every day like a cross between Ms. Frizzle and an oriental grandma. I think these duds fit the bill.

Charles Anastase:
What the heck is that thing? I'll call it: "Satanic Barrister Pony".

Jill Stuart FTW:

Mary Katrantzou BROKE MY RAD-O-METER
All images from Style.com


And in keeping with the theme, a nice song from Pattern is Movement. Love those dudes!

from the International Quilt Study Center and Museum

Not to, uh, advocate drug use or anything, but why doesn't anyone ever get high and design quilts? People paint or draw or whatever, but I want to see a quilt that looks like a trip. I'd sleep under that.

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Do like Breezy:
Read all morning about train wrecks and victorian fashions here.
Gaze all afternoon at photos of amazink quilts here.