Nick Jonas and Cats in Flying Ski-Doos

So this is just me rehashing other people's hash, but some of these illustrated celebwity tweets by Odess Begay make me giggle. [sidenote: 'Odessa' is so going on my list of future-probably-not children's names. Don't pretend like you never think about these things, especially all of you ardent baby-haters.]Her other non-celebrity-tweet-related work is here, if you are at the office and looking for ways to waste time instead of finishing that exciting excel spreadsheet. Coughcough.

Happy Wednesday to thee.

Black and White and Black and White

Tildar does not approve of these cupcakes.

But I do. You should make some then eat a few and go jogging, after which you will squat down to catch your breath and rip a hole in the crotch of your leggings. It happened to someone I know.

Blooms On Mah Bloomers

I've been looking for something to wear under dresses and skirts while I ride my bike to work this spring - don't want to distract oncoming traffic, eh eh. Bike shorts are out, just because there's nothing worse than sitting 8 hours in the office with a bad case of swass. I thought I'd do like the Victorians and go with bloomers. When I was in elementary school, I had grandma-sewn bloomers comin' out the ying yang, and I loved wearing them. Plus, this pattern from Colette is conveniently free. I like free things. Aren't these pretty?

Then I made my own pair and was delighted to find that bloomers are the perfect garment if you want your butt to look huge and saggy! Yay! They are rather ill-fitting, but this is probably due to my inability to follow directions and prepare properly. That's what makes me so ghetto home fabulous. I have better things to do than preshrink my fabric or buy the right kind of elastic or cut out those little triangles in the pattern so my pieces line up correctly blah blah blah. No matter. I will wear these anyhow because who is even going to see them? No one.

Except for oncoming traffic on a windy day.

Smug Narwhal

Oh looky what I made for my shop. His name is Orville.

Rabbit Rabbit

I've been doing nothing but drawing and sewing these last couple of nights. It's been good for my little heart.

Here is Tildar, on paper and on film. She is still as naughty as ever. Last night I caught her under my bed, EATING MY VINTAGE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE DOLL. Guh.

Crips, etc.

If I had $79 USD to spend on a plastic bicycle basket which I would surely drop and break after a week of use, I would buy this Marie Louise Gustafsson model from Design House Stockholm and carry my rabbit inside of it while I cruise around my neighborhood on a sunny summer afternoon. Unfortunately this would not be possible because A) I do not have $79 to spend on a flipping bike basket and B) in all likelihood, said rabbit would leap from said basket, bite me, scurry into a sewer drain where she would happen upon a pool of radioactive slime, transform into a hideous rabbit-monster, and join up with the Crips. Blue is her color.

Speakin of Crips...I am moving downtown in a couple-three weeks, hurrah. Tildar the Terrible and I found a pretty swank pad on Goodhue Boulevard. Goodhue will also be the name of my new etsy shop. I've been working pretty hard lately making cool stuff to sell like owl masks and tiny taxidermy. Planned shop opening day is April 30 and I'm stickin' to it. We'll see how it goes...

Whisker Time

Happy Mustache March, everyone. As you can see, things have gotten pretty loosey goosey on my upper lip (especially around that there mole), and I think it's about time to reclaim my dignity. I guess it's hard for people to take ladies with facial hair seriously. Good thing I just bought that 16-pack of pink plastic lady razors. Godspeed to those continuing on with this month's fuzzy festivities, and just a reminder: Junibrow June(soft J's) is only two and a half months away[?!], so get ready for that.

P.S. I just tried to make s'mores in the microwave with my leftover Valentine's Day candy. Somehow I managed to burn the graham crackers into little black squares. That never happens! How did that happen? Guh.

Trois Trucs

1. Mad props to the Alice in Wonderland costume designers. Alice's dresses are pretty much the only good thing about that movie.

2. I made black bean brownies on Saturday. I don't even like beans. And I didn't like these brownies. Hm. This is probably because I didn't run the beans through the food processor long enough. Blech. Also, if you are brave and decide to make these, follow the recipe exactly. I thought I'd be a rebel and tweak things like I always do (that's what she said), but seriously, don't skimp on any ingredients or else you will really taste those beans.
3. I fixed my camera so I can finally photograph my projects once more. All this balmy, rainy weather has me in the mood for artsing. Pictured here is the Daawuud portrait, and in the background, the awesome dancey-prancey gold leaf unicorn mug that we found in my fake grandma's basement. Fake grandmas are the best.

Cheer Tears: Sassy Singing Pony People

I cannot describe the feelings that this video evokes within me, and for some reason it just seems so Ghetto Home Fabulous. Oh, the places I would go if I had such a pony costume...

Busberry Stopcake

Turtle Loot Monday presents: I just can't take this level of whimsy. Just can't take it. Does not compute. I mean, if I lived in Japan, stuff like this would encourage me to become a hobo. Why have a home when I could rest my greasy head in a

FRUIT.

SHAPED.

BUS STOP.

Via Bluebird Vintage.